Mentally, it’s difficult for children to distinguish between fantasy and reality for years after they are born (at least they have the excuse of immature brain development, unfortunately this excuse wears thin for adults), but I imagine with the computer graphics we have these days, it’s a whole hell of a lot harder than it used to be.

My daughter and I frequently watch animal shows; the weirder the animals are, the more I like them.  We have watched numerous shows about deep sea life and all the bizarro creepy crawlies down in the dark, we watch countless shows on bizarre bugs, and have a large collection of bug books featuring creatures seemingly evolved as a bad joke.  On my coffee table I have a large book dedicated to animals who go all out for camouflage, each one a more extravagant assemblage than the last.

Recently we were watching one of the “The Most Xtreme” animal shows–this time “The Most” being “Best of the Bizarre”. The show included the platypus, naked mole rats, and others of similar ilk, and one in particular caught my daughter’s attention: the deep sea angler fish. Deep sea angler fish have one of the most bizarre reproductive strategies in the entire world: Male angler fish are about 1/50th the size of females, and when they find a female in the long, cold, dark, they attach themselves and never let go (although to anyone who’s had a super clingy ex this may come as no surprise).

Eventually, the male almost disappears entirely into the female’s body (I could make a joke here but won’t); their head disappears, they form a cooperative blood supply, and they look like they are some type of parasite or nasty case of the deep down warts–which scientists assumed for a long time they were until they figured out the truth.  After this section, for some inexplicable reason, there was a section on mermaids.  I didn’t pay close enough attention to see what parallel the show made between the bizarre but true and the bizarre but bullshit, but it confused my daughter.

Right after the show we were just about to eat dinner and I was busy prepping stuff.  My daughter was saying something about how strange the angler fish was; I was only half listening and distractedly commented,

“Yes, honey, the world is full of strange and wondrous things..” To which my daughter replied with the half question, half statement,

“But not mermaids”.